One of the best ways to improve your relationships is to develop the habit of drawing attention to EGGs.
Not the ones you cook, but the innumerable Evidences of God’s Grace that he lavishes on you and those around you … and calls you to recount to others. As David wrote:
“I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds†(Ps. 9:1).
“Oh give thanks to the Lord; call upon his name; make known his deeds among the peoples!†(Ps. 105:1).
Evidences of God’s grace—of his wonderful deeds, both large and small—are everywhere, if you’ll just open your eyes to see them.
The greatest evidence of God’s grace, of course, is our salvation in Christ. As C.H. Spurgeon put it,
“The joy of the saints in heaven is comprised of this: Jesus chose us, loved us, bought us, cleansed us, robed us, kept us, glorified us: we are here entirely through the Lord Jesus.”
But God’s grace flows into your life in countless other ways. Your health, senses, family, friends, talents, and material possessions are all evidences of his grace.
When you or others are kind, patient, thoughtful, generous, or forgiving, it’s because of God’s grace. Whether it’s something as simple as letting someone go first at an intersection or something as hard as forgiving a great wrong, it only occurs because God’s grace is flowing …
Because none of those things would happen in a fallen world apart from his grace.
God’s grace also fuels meaningful labor. Every new insight, creative idea, diligent effort, and successful project is another EGG. Even when people deny that there is a God, all of their gifts, talents, and accomplishments come from him as a form of his common grace.
EGGs Fuel Relationships
EGGs are an essential element of relational wisdom, for they fuel God-awareness, self-awareness, and other-awareness.
Do you want a more vibrant relationship with God? Then develop the habit of constantly thanking him for the EGGs he showers on you.
Do you want to have an accurate and confident understanding of your gifts, talents, and purposes? Then dwell on the steady flow of EGGs that equip and empower you for serving God.
Do you want to have closer, warmer, and more productive relationships with the people around you—at home, at church, and at work—then speak often about the EGGs you see in their lives.
Practical Examples of Drawing Attention to EGGs
To God: “Thank you, Lord, for giving me another day. Thank you that I can see the sky and hear my children laughing; that I can walk and talk and enjoy my family and friends; that I have work to do, helpful skills, people to serve. But most of all, thank you that you have forgiven me all my sins through Jesus and adopted me as your dearly loved child.â€
To your wife: “God has given you such a kind and gentle spirit. I am so blessed to be your husband. Every day you get up and devote yourself to our family, anticipating our needs, sacrificing your interests for ours, and pouring wisdom and grace into our lives. There are a lot of fine women out there, but you surpass them all!â€
To your husband: “Thank you for how hard you work to provide for our family. You head to the office with a positive attitude every day, even when things aren’t going well. God has given you such a creative mind; I’ve never seen a problem you couldn’t solve, either at work or at home. But mostly I love the way you are constantly seeking after God and teaching us to do the same.â€
To a friend: “Your loyalty and support over the last year has meant the world to me. I’ve felt like a total failure at times, but your constant encouragement has kept me going and restored my confidence that God is not done with me yet. Thank you for being a channel of his grace into my life.â€
To your teen: “You’ve grown so much in the last year. You’ve become more disciplined with your school work, your job, and your money. But most of all I love to see what a thoughtful and caring person you’ve become, not only toward your sisters and friends, but also toward kids at school who are often left out. I look at you and I see Jesus shining through.â€
To your co-worker: “I really enjoy working with you. You are always upbeat, creative, and open to new ideas. When you say you’ll do something, you always follow through. And I’ll never forget that weekend you came in to help me meet a deadline. You’ve set an example for all of us to follow.â€
You can draw attention to similar EGGs with a bank teller who accurately handles your transaction, a mechanic who skillfully fixes your car, or a barista who smiles as she hands you a steaming latte. Just open your eyes and you’ll see evidences of God’s grace everywhere.
If you make it a habit to draw attention to the EGGs in other people’s lives—to focus on the God-given good in them rather than their flaws or failures—you’ll be surprised to see how glad people will be to see you coming, how much they will enjoy working with you, and how often you’ll have a chance to tell them where all those EGGs are coming from.
– Ken Sande
Reflection Questions
- How does drawing attention to EGGs honor God? (see Ps. 86:12)
- Read Ephesians 4:29 and Philippians 4:8-9. How do these passages support the concept of drawing attention to EGGs? What other Bible passages encourage us to see and celebrate evidences of God’s grace in our lives?
- Why would other people be happy to see you coming if you had a habit of drawing attention to EGGs in their lives? Why would they enjoy working with you? Why would you have more opportunities to talk to them about the source of the blessings in their lives?
- Make a list of several people you interact with regularly and list two or three EGGs in each person’s life. Share your insights this week and notice the response.
- Make a reminder on your computer or smart phone, or with an old-fashioned sticky note, to draw attention to at least three EGGs in other people’s lives ever day. Ask God to keep working in you until it becomes a habit.
Permission to distribute: Please feel free to download, print, or electronically share this message in its entirety for non-commercial purposes with as many people as you like.
© 2014 Ken Sande
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